


Just A Joke

by QueenOfRohirrim



Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Caranthir Has Had Enough, Dark Humor, Don’t worry, F/M, Gen, M/M, Nobody Actually Dies, Poison, Revenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:08:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22621516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenOfRohirrim/pseuds/QueenOfRohirrim
Summary: Celegorm should have kept his mouth shut but he was never very smart.
Relationships: Caranthir | Morifinwë & Sons of Fëanor, Caranthir | Morifinwë/Haleth of the Haladin, Celegorm | Turcafinwë/Curufin | Curufinwë
Comments: 2
Kudos: 44





	Just A Joke

The seven sons of Feanor rarely came together in their entirety after their father’s demise. 

One would visit another here and there over the years and occasionally three or four of them would meet once in a great while, but to have all seven at one table was quite rare.

So it was that these meetings of all of Feanor’s children became somewhat sacred to the family, and really Caranthir shouldn’t have been shocked to see Celegorm attempt to humiliate him during one of these scarce evenings. Ruining family gatherings was something he was rather good at.

Still, a small part of him was surprised when his elder brother gave him a wicked smirk and presented one of Lady Haleth’s abandoned night gowns to the rest of the table. 

“It appears, my dear brothers, that gentle Moryo is not as innocent as we thought him to be.” The silver haired hunter chuckled, still grinning giddly across the table at Caranthir, who was already blushing furiously as he reached over to snatch the garment back from the thief’s hands.

“Is that any business of yours?”

Maedhros was eyeing Celegorm with a clear look of distaste over the rim of his glass, but Tyelko didn’t care to hear the eldest’s warning.

“Of course it’s business of mine, Nelyo.” Celegorm replied with a cruel laugh. “My sweet brother is no longer a blushing virgin. How wonderful for him!”

“Who is she, Moryo?” Curufin inquired, a knowing smile slipping easily across his face as he joined in Celegorm’s jests. “Is She a mortal, perhaps? A Haladin maybe?”

Caranthir remained silent still, though he wanted to seize the both of them by the throat.

“A mortal?” Amras raised a brow, Amrod following his every move and expression. 

“Moryo, that is not wise...” Maglor frowned, his eyes filled with genuine worry and fear for his little brother. “A mortal for a lover? They have very short lives.”

“Enough!” Maedhros demanded rather forcefully, still holding a giggling Celegorm firmly in his sights. “I’ll hear no more of this. Moryo’s private affairs are his own. Shame on you, Tyelko!”

“Perhaps Moryo shouldn’t leave his lady’s lost clothing lying around for anyone to find.” Celegorm sniggered, drawing a snort from Curufin as well.

“Perhaps you shouldn’t wander into my bedchamber when you’ve not been invited.” Caranthir finally spoke up, the mortified blush still settled bright and crimson upon his pale cheeks and over the bridge of his nose. “Not that you should be in any position to shame me, whatever you find. I might hold love for a mortal but I can’t say I’ve ever had the pleasure of fucking my own brother.”

Now, Curufin looked ready to kill at that sharp comment, but Celegorm held him fast, slipping an arm around his waist to pull him close and kiss his face.

“He’s a bitter little thing, Curvo. Stay right where you are.” The silver noldor whispered gently into his lover’s ear, his playful blue eyes never leaving Caranthir’s dangerous looking dark ones. 

“You can pretend to be as prudish as you like, Moryo. We all know better now, don’t we?” 

“Tyelko! Curvo! I’ll have a word with you both!” Maedhros demanded from the head of the table, slamming his knife down so hard that Maglor and the twins were shocked that it didn’t cut through the polished wood. 

Celegorm rolled his eyes and stood from the table, taking Curufin’s hand to lead him away. “Come on, lovely. Nelyo’s going to give us both a smack on the wrist.”

“Out!” Maedhros demanded again.

If he had need to shout one more, Maglor feared he might be angry enough to drag both out by their hair.

Celegorm seemed to know that he’d reached their elder brother’s thresh hold as well, as he didn’t say another word.

Caranthir watched him and Curufin slip out of the dining hall, making sure that Maedhros followed before he got up from his chair as well. 

“Excuse me.” He sighed at his three remaining brothers. “It appears that I’m going to need stronger wine to get through this delightful dinner.”

The twins looked to Maglor, shocked by this sudden combustion of tension between them all. 

“A mortal?” Amrod whispered as quietly as he possibly could. “And Moryo? I can’t believe it.”

“Shh.” Maglor hushed the both of them before Amras could add anything else. “Say nothing. Is that understood?”

The twins nodded and went back to their meals. Even they knew better than to test Caranthir’s temper.

.....

“I do hope we can put this ugliness behind us, Moryo.” Celegorm ventured upon his return to the table in Helevorn’s dining hall. “I never meant to offend, of course. It was only a joke.”

“Mmhm.” His younger brother hummed with a single nod, pouring himself another glass of the vintage wine he’d brought up from the cellars. He then reached over to fill Celegorm’s cup as well as a show of accepted peace. “So long as I don’t hear anything more on the matter, I don’t see why we need to dwell on it.”

“Good,” Celegorm nodded, taking up the wine and toasting his still blushing sibling. “I’m happy for you anyway. Here’s to your lady.”

Caranthir smiled ever so slightly and brought his glass back to his lips. 

He did not drink. He simply waited and watched.

By the time Celegorm found the deception in his brother’s eyes it was far too late. He’d already taken a long gulp of the tainted liquor. 

“You absolute bastard!” He shouted before his throat began to itch and ache in response to the poison.

Maedhros raised his head and looked from Tyelko to Moryo. “What’s happened now?” He demanded.

“Moryo! How could you!?” Curufin screeched then from his coughing brother’s side. “Nelyo! He’s poisoned Tyelko! Do something!”

Both Maedhros and Maglor stood quickly from their chairs and ran to Tyelko’s side in a panic while Curufin began to sob and the twins looked on in horror.

Celegorm continued to hack and cough violently while Caranthir sat back and watched with a grin. “Do you regret your words, brother?” He giggled at his victim, pulling a tiny vile of dark liquid from his robes. “Are you sorry?”

“Moryo!” Maedhros screamed. “Give him the antidote!”

Caranthir sighed and uncorked the vile, pouring it into a nearby glass of water. “A shame I’m not a more wicked elf. I would have liked to watch him suffer awhile longer...but you are my brother, Tyelko.”

Celegorm gasped and took in a long breath after he’d grabbed hold of the water and drained every drop from the glass. 

“Oh Tyelko, are you alright!?” Curufin weeped, shoving the others away from their brother, who seemed to be recovering now.

“That vile wretch...” Celegorm heaved. “He tried to kill me...”

All eyes rested on Caranthir, and even Maedhros looked afraid. 

It didn’t help when Moryo began to laugh as he’d never laughed before, succeeding in adding to the terror.

“What’s become of you?” Maedhros shook his head in disbelief.

Caranthir’s laughter died down and he smiled softly at the eldest of his brothers. “You think I’d murder my own flesh and blood for a stupid jest?” He asked him, looking at each of the others as well. “You’ve all grown mad. It was just an irritant, not a poison. He wouldn’t have died.”

“Bastard!” Celegorm shouted anyway, getting to his feet and gripping Curufin’s arm. “Damn you, Moryo!”

Caranthir only grinned at him, though he looked just as innocent as a rabid wolf of Sauron. “It was only a joke, big brother.” He insisted. 

Maedhros dragged him from the room quickly after, and he was punished for his crimes, but at least Tyelko never spoke another word against Lady Haleth again.


End file.
